Funny Girl...Things I love

As always it was a typical day in the life of living at the Cook house.  When it comes to Mike, I mean I'm talking the man changes second by second like Heckle and Jeckle.  That being said, this mans life has changed as dramatically as is possible for any one human to take. Not only has my life changed, but his has for sure.  Well TSAD has fucked us both.  Let's be honest.  He went from working and playing tennis 4 or 5 days a week,  to walking in the kitchen to a hot cooked meal at night (at lest he knew food came from that part of the house), playing poker and doing as he pleased.  Now he can't leave me for more than two hours.  We both lived pretty cushie lives for that matter.  I worked, did all the laundry, and cleaned  over four thousand square foot of house. I also played tennis, went to Happy Hours on a regular basis and did whatever I wanted. Those days are far over!  He has given up mostly everything.  In return he is pretty pissy!  He is doing everything I just mentioned and then some, except clean the house.  We now have people to do that.  Where was my head all those years?  Everything is now on his schedule, from when we eat to when I shower.  He has total power for the first time in 42 years.  Guess what?  There is not a fucking thing I can do about it.  Wha wha. 

Well yesterday I had enough!  I called him to take me from the shower to bed.  He didn't like the "tone" I used when I called him.  Mind you I have about 50% of my voice left.  He came into the bathroom and said I'm going to count to a hundred slowly as I can before I'll take you to bed.  He started one...two...three..four.  I believe he could see the fumes at that point.  He might have seen the fumes but why not push a few more buttons?  Which he did...duh.   He quit counting after nine, ten he would be dead. 

So he got my T-shirt on after continually pushing my buttons.  The fumes were coming faster by the second.  So I had enough.  I reared back with my good arm (I use that term loosely) and I punched him in the nuts!  His eyes turned to the size of saucers.  He looked at me, a touch of green in his face and said, "that hurt".  I started laughing so hard I thought I was going to pee the bed.  I mean I was couldn't stop laughing!  So moral to this story, you piss off a girl long enough she just might nut knock you!  One...two...three...

Nut knocker on,,,

Sue "CiCi" Cook

Flowers...Things I Love

Another doctors appointment.  This time it was a Neuromuscular Pulmonogist.  Yes Dr. Asshole was a barrel of laughs.  He rambled on and on about my future death in detail.  I ever so politely tired to interrupt him 45 minutes into his death speech...he ever so rudely looked me square in the face and informed me he was not finished.  It's not the death speech that got to me nearly as bad as I've heard this speech 50 times and they all act like this news is going to be shocking.  Later my daughter told me she knew he was dead in the water at that point (does she know me or what). I did ANOTHER breathing test, only to be told I am at  40-50% in breathing capability.  Then I was told I have been using my bpap machine wrong for 2 years.  The person that brought it and set it up, put the wrong settings in. Yes 2 years of fucking sleeping with nose pillows, fighting this stupid machine was for not!  Yeah idiot!  Guess he really gave a flying shit I have the Shit Ass Disease (TSAD)!  Dr. Asshole's staff was amazing, so I guess it was worth it. This is called rant and retrieve!

My daughter sent me a  post from Facebook from Steve Gleason (former NFL player that has TSAD) in which he said, "Its funny how exhausting not moving can be".  I love how someone with TSAD can sum it up in one sentence.

So with all that being said, I want to change this post to something I love. If I had unlimited funds I would have a house full of fresh flowers. I mean I know they are expensive, they die after a short period of time, but this is my fantasy so screw off (ha ha)!  I would have them in every room, changed out every other day.  Cool vases, everything from modern clear glass to milk glass.  They would be so full you wouldn't be able to put one more flower in the vase.  Mostly pink (duh).  Here are a few of what I would have:

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So that's my rant and retrieve and pretentious fantasy.
Flower on...
Sue "CiCi"Cook